Lana often reminds us that “from fire comes light” and I find this reassuring when voicing an opinion that is different to some of the dominant voices. Knowing it’s okay to question and disagree is like having a fire extinguisher on hand when the flames get too fierce. But sometimes I feel burned by that fire and this makes me question my role and my ideas in both positive and negative ways. Sometimes the burn is a first degree and I recover quickly. But some burns are third degree which leave lifelong scars. Some scars have changed me for the better. Some scars have made me feel unsafe around fire.
Some fires are so fast moving they leave little time to prepare and respond, consuming everything in it’s path, from which some never fully recover.
Other fires are slow burning and productive, clearing out the undergrowth, making space for regeneration.
My wonderings this week are:
How do I respond to the flames that give 3rd degree burns?
How do I respond to the toxic smoke that I feel is choking me at times?
Do I distance myself from the fire completely?
How do I develop fire resistant skin?
Am I too sensitive? Should I care less?
What’s my role when the fires are burning?
Some fire-starters think I’m trying to put the fire out. That’s not my intention at all. My instinct is to assess the ferocity of the flames and prevent third degree burns for myself and others. I know sometimes I do bring too big an extinguisher and then I realise the fire is being contained in other ways and put it away.
Some flames scar and others allow me to bask in their warmth.